Moving Meditation: thoughts and feelings as a result of exercise euphoria and meditative moments. Bliss.
5AM Comes Once A Day
5AM may be an ungodly hour for most. For me, it's the exact opposite. It's an hour that I feel closest to God and most in touch with my body and inner beliefs. No, I don't get down on my knees and pray nor do I spend the early morning hours in a church confessing my sins. I exercise.
Exercising at this hour for me has a deep impact on my soul. It stirs up memories, feelings of euphoria, happy times, accomplishments, and the release of negativity and stress. I hear so many people complain about getting up to exercise in the morning before work. They have decided to make it a horrible experience before they've ever given themselves the opportunity to feel any different.
I honestly believe that every individual controls their thoughts. Everything in life is based on your perspective and past experiences. No one likes pain, no one likes to feel uncomfortable, awkward, insecure. So don't.
I can't say it enough. Find what makes you happy. No one in life is going to tell you what it is. It's up to you to find it. I believe it's one's purpose in life-creating your own happiness and maintaining it. Modern society has inflicted us with a lack of fitness; so yes it must be done on your time if you expect to have a quality life and health, but you can choose how you're going to do it. I view exercise for general health simply like this: Get your heart rate up and keep it there for at least 20 minutes a day. Now, fill in the blanks how that will be done. There's a lot of wiggle room here. Do what makes you happy. Exercise and fitness is my happiness. It has given me confidence, pleasure, goals, dreams, opportunities, and sincere inner joy in many different ways.
Getting off the exercise train for a moment- a word on happiness, something that always crosses my mind during my "moving meditation." I define true feelings of happiness and passion as a feeling that you could not live without. If anyone offered you millions of dollars for it you would never sell, if anyone tried to take it away you would hold on with a death grip and fight to the death. All because, no one can live without "their happiness."
I had a conversation with my Dad about the topic of happiness the other night. I explained how I thought many people find themselves unhappy later in life, because they grow up doing everything that makes everyone else happy thinking it's their happiness when in fact they've never taken the time to learn what their true happiness is.
Growing up I often turned to my Dad to ask questions on deep matters such as this. I remember when I first dived fully into training mode when I was 21, and realized it was my happiness. I loved being in training. I loved living a healthy lifestyle before I even knew I was. I had so many dreams in college about writing articles for major health and fitness magazines, being a fitness "guru" if you will, writing books, seminars, videos, the works. I would wake up and get to work on all it everyday-making lists, planning how to take action, how to make it happen. The hard work of creating this dream, trying (and still trying) to make it all a reality, training everyday, competing, etc. all played into my ultimate happiness factor. There was one problem though, I didn't feel like a "normal 21 year old." I realized that I loved what I was doing more than staying out until 2 AM, having a long term boyfriend, many boyfriends, spring break flings, or even a crush for that matter.
I struggled with "is this happiness?" because it wasn't what everyone else was doing. Go to college, get a 9-5 job, get married, have kids, then what? Vacations to Disney World when I'm 40? Spend my life trying to make enough money so I can do the things I really want when I'm 65? No thanks. It may be right for some, but not for me. I decided a long time ago to take a different path.
Over the years I've come to realize that it doesn't matter what everyone else is doing. I guess that whole anti-peer pressure thing is true. College professors and philosophers preach it, "go off, live out your wildest dreams, go against the grain, dare to different." But who does it?
It's not easy and it never will be. In fact the struggle and hard work is what I believe really brings happiness. The journey is always better than the prize.
As a ran on the beach at 5AM this morning then sat in the sand watching the sun rise. All the beautiful shades of pink and orange danced on the horizon. Hints of morning light reflected on the calm ocean waters. Beads of salty sweat began to dry against my tanned skin and my heart rate began to slow down. I thanked God realizing in this moment I am happy. How lucky am I that 5AM comes everyday.
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